Day #6 - Love is Not Irritable - Nicole

Life is a marathon not a sprint! That is a mouthful for me. I am a sprinter, I like things done quickly and correctly. Unfortunately that is hard to be accomplished in a family of 5. Everyone has their own schedule and life does not evolve around me...selfishness like they mention on page 27. On most days I can handle my "mood" pretty well but on my days that I "choose" to loose control, my home is not peaceful and I know it's because of me. I am not a yeller or aggressive but I can be demanding. I will become so driven then I will mow down anyone insight, especially my family.

The question asked today was where to add margin, for me, I know it is when those times come I need to be still, go to God and ask him to take control and I have to release mine. The triggers for me are disorder, too much on the to do list, panic about Andy's addictions, children's behavior, and over commitment. I am grateful for this challenge so I can search my heart next time I feel out of control and then OVER control the household to a point of relentless irritability.

My fabulous mentor challenges me with my "list" that I seem to always have running. What if something is not completed? What if it stays on the list a little longer? Does it really matter? Is it worth me loosing my cool over it? My mood seems to set the temperature for the household, so am I willing to bring down everyone in the home over what ever that item is?

I am human, and sometimes I do everything to get the list to disappear. My motivation is control. Now my list is like most other moms: grocery, laundry, errands, house cleaning, bills and what ever else comes along,which seems to be a lot. Since I went back to work months ago, I struggle to get the list done, have quality family time and good meals on the table. So today I am deciding to not let my list control me! I am making a choice to control the list and choose to love my family first, especially Andy! This weekend I messed up and did a massive Christmas list focus and at 8:30p realized I had not fulfilled a promise to Andy. So I got my head together and pulled off the surprise and I think he was thrilled! Irritability is a choice and I think that is a gift Andy would love this year, for me to choose to NOT be irritable!